You have been counting down to this day for MONTHS. Constantly asking when your day would come. When would you get your blue cake and have everyone sing Happy Birthday to F. And somehow it’s finally here. I’ve been calling you a two year old every day leading up to this, savoring these last bits when you’re still so little. Because in many ways you are so big.
Seven
Happy 7th Birthday!
This has been such a big year of self discovery for you. You’ve learned to read well enough to learn to love it, and devour books - especially graphic novels. You also love math (and make everyone constantly quiz you) and learning animal facts too. You’ve also learned a lot about yourself and how you identify and what makes you happy. I’m always impressed in your confidence even when it’s not popular. And we are happy to be your always support and cheerleaders.
FIVE
Five seems like a big number. Five means kindergarten is coming. More and more I look at pictures of him and realize that he has gotten so big. Everything about him looks older and not like the little kid he used to be. He’s calmer than he was, his outbursts (while still epic) are less frequent and easier controlled. It’s hard knowing that the upcoming year is going to be both hard and exciting for him (any mentions of kindergarten leads to an immediate meltdown), and that he’ll grow even more.
He’s been working to pick up new skills - how to get himself dressed every day, and put his dishes away after a meal. His drawing skills are also getting really good and are so impressive. Pictures he draws have gone from cute and funny to almost shockingly good.
TWO
You are an amazing TWO year old. So clever, I find you figuring out problems with ease. Can’t reach something? Next thing I know you’ve grabbed a step stool and grabbed whatever you needed. You watch your siblings and learn from them all the time.
You have no fear (a little fear once in a while might be a good thing, you know? Maybe a few less black eyes?) and literally dive into everything head first. You’ll jump off anything, tackle anyone, and everyone who meets you uses the word “bruiser” to describe you. However you’re also super nurturing. You always “make drinks” for everyone and can also be found taking care of your babies. If your older siblings look sad, you’ll give up your own toys to try and cheer them up.
SIX
It’s been a big year. E has almost finished Kindergarten and has grown so much over the past year. He has learned many new skills. We’ve seen him crush math worksheets, utilize new art skills which landed him a spot in the town wide art show, and enter the beginning stages of learning how to read. He comes home daily with new knowledge about things we’ve never discussed - it’s equally thrilling and scary to no longer be the only source of information in his life.
He regularly does 200-500 piece puzzles and non stop Lego kits that he takes apart and uses to build something else. He’s less into coloring, but loves making cards for people. He still loves crafts but dislikes painting. He loves running until his hair is wet and sweaty, but also loves to sit and cuddle with me - often waking up an hour before anyone else to find me in the house and get alone time with me.
Four
Somehow here we are, and you’re four. You are growing and changing at an alarming rate lately. Suddenly you are writing letters and drawing people and your face looks older, and I’m just wondering where my little G went. You are still super sweet and loving. You’ll appear and offer a toy to F when she’s crying, or will tell me you love me when you see me having a hard day. You love to cuddle and wake up slow in the mornings, and almost always have something soft to rub on your face.
Mother's and Mama Day
May is quickly becoming my least favorite month, which is unfortunate, because it used to be my favorite. But it suddenly feels like there’s so much to do and plan! It’s hard to think about myself, and my birthday (or Mother’s Day) when I’m trying to play E’s birthday. I’m trying to find a happy medium, though, where I’ll still celebrate and enjoy myself but not be too stressed. I joked this year that I’m going to start moving my birthday to February, because I could use some more fun there, and less to do in May.
FIVE
HOW did we get here. I had babies and babies and suddenly I have a child old enough to go to school (which you will this fall).
You are sweet and caring and love to do things to make other’s happy. You send love notes to people in the mail, bring your siblings their favorite toys, share treats/snacks and you love to cuddle, especially after you’re supposed to be in bed.
You feel things deeply and take things personally. I often have to make sure I take extra time to talk about feelings with you. For example yet another pair of pants you were wearing ended up getting a hole in the knee, and I could see how sad you were. You were feeling ashamed, like you’d done something wrong. I had to sit you down and let you know that it wasn’t your fault, it was the pants. They weren’t strong enough, and we’d buy new ones. I didn’t want you to play any differently or worry about them. I can definitely see the rule following personality traits of an oldest child forming in you, and while it’s something that can be helpful to a parent or teacher, I want you to learn when to break the rules too.
Our Weekend
Work has been insanely busy and stressful lately, I feel like I don’t get to see my kids enough during the day, and there’s never enough time to cross everything we need to do around the house off my list, but last weekend was the first weekend since F has been born that we haven’t felt like we were drowning. So there’s that!
A Wrap on Christmas
December and 2021 are officially over, and I think I’m still processing how I feel about that. I started the year convinced the pandemic would finally be behind us, especially since we’d all be able to get vaccines. I also started the year pregnant, which seems so far away considering the energetic baby we have now. But before I try to process the year some more, or look forward to the next one, here’s one final Christmas post summary, mostly for my memory.
Big or small, here are the things we did to celebrate Christmas this year:
A Curious Birthday
Usually it’s great having a child who likes everything. He’s almost always excited, and it’s very easy to make him happy. The downside, though, is it’s hard to figure out what he likes. Obviously the answer is everything, but when you’re trying to buy him a present, or pick a birthday theme, “everything” isn’t the most helpful answer. Add in the complication of trying to make sure it’s something that he likes, and not something he’s just copying from his brother, and we were coming up pretty empty.
Three Years
The other morning I woke you up and told that you while you were two years old that morning, you’d soon be three! And you said “No! I’m your baby always!” and then you had me scoop you up and rock you in my arms. It was just what my soul needed as I mourn all of my children growing way too fast. But then again, you always seem to know what other people need lately. I’ve dubbed you a caregiver more than once lately. You often tell me that if I’m scared it’s okay, because you’re here for me. And we all call you our Italian grandmother, since you love feeding people. It brings you so much joy, and you won’t take no for an answer. No one can come into our house without getting some of your meal fed to them. You also will seek out my water from across the house and bring it to me to make sure I’m drinking enough water.
FOUR
I think I have to stop calling you a toddler. You are suddenly so grown up, and I have no idea how this happened. I miss my baby a bit, but it’s also a lot of fun to watch you become who you are.
You are still my sweetness, completely. You often come up to me and tell me that you have four things for me, and then you give me a kiss, a hug, a squeeze and a cuddle. While you fight with your brother often, you are just as often sweet and caring to him as well.
Happy Birthday to Me!
Mostly here to remind myself - I honestly woke up this morning and had no clue. I’ve been doing this thing lately where I focus so much on E’s birthday, that I completely forget about mine. My birthday, which I used to spend 2 months planning and thinking about. Instead I spend that time thinking about how to make E’s birthday special. Nothing particularly wrong with that, I suppose, but my goal for the next year is to try not to forget about myself so much. I’m sure it would be easy to do with 3 small children, so maybe if I make a promise to myself now, I’ll at least be thinking about it.
Anyway, happy birthday to me!
Another Pandemic Birthday
Not that we would have done much different, but they are all starting to blend together a bit. Overall it was actually really nice. As we were all sitting down at the table and eating dinner together, I had a moment when I looked around and felt such contentment. I was truly enjoying myself and my family. It wasn’t stressful, I wasn’t jumping up to get something every few minutes or correcting any behavior. It was just a really nice family meal.
A Pandemic Party
Just because there isn’t going to be a big party, doesn’t mean that I can’t decorate like there would be! Picking out a theme, deciding what the cake would look like, those are things that are fun to me. I enjoy doing that for my children’s birthdays, so even though we’re in the middle of a pandemic, that didn’t stop me.
TWO
Sometimes I have a hard time time coming to terms with the fact that you’ll be two, since for me, time has stood still during this pandemic. Much like my desk calendar in the city, my mind is stuck in March. You know, back before you even knew how to walk? So how can it be that you’re two? On the other hand, it seems like I’ve been telling you forever that you don’t “get” to wear a mask until you’re two! Just a little bit longer to wait, we keep telling you. (Don’t think it’s lost on me that the biggest marker of you turning two will be that you need to be masked now - what a perfect snapshot of our world).
THREE
Three feels big. Heavy and important and monumental. Two still felt like a baby, still felt close to birth, with everything felt fresh and new. Three feels so big and so old. It’s hard to explain the feeling, but when I had babies I didn’t feel like a mother so much. I felt like a caregiver of tiny humans, someone who was given a gift of these squishly little creatures to take care of. Now I feel like I have a child. A child that I have to raise, mother, and teach.
Three is old enough to ask questions and remember things that I’ve told him. Three is big enough that I need to think about what I say before I saw it, unless I want it repeated forever and to everyone.
The Original May Birthday
Quarantine birthdays are not an unique experience anymore. We’ve had months of people celebrating in quarantine at this point, and we’ve missed first birthdays and 18th birthdays and so my 35th wasn’t a huge deal. We probably wouldn’t have done much different had there not been a quarantine. Sure, I would have loved to go to a movie theater or sat in a Starbucks while I caught up with my best friend, but the empty parking lot where we met while we sat in our trunks was actually kind of fun. It certainly made it memorable.
Happy Birthday Tom!!
Happy Birthday Tom!!
Birthdays definitely look a little different during quarantine, but we’re doing the best we can. We went for a family walk to get outside, I made us some confetti brownies to celebrate, and we even have a party to go to later. Sure, it would have been more fun to go in person, but we’re still excited.