I've been choosing sleep.
I see other moms who read. Who clean or shop or cook. Who have time for hobbies. When do you find the time?? I ask.
I stay up late, they respond.
Oh.
There is only time for one of those things. Sleep or free time. I can do the things I want, or I can sleep.
I've been choosing sleep. And still it's not enough. It's barely enough to get by. So no, I can't give up more of it. There will be time later. When they're sleeping more. When they're not as little and don't want me as much.
Lately when I do have time to sit down and write, nothing comes. You know when it comes? Right when I've found the comfy spot on my pillow. The words pour beautifully in my mind, and I debate getting up and writing them down. I'll remember them tomorrow, I lie to myself. And they slip away, never to be heard again.