Wordless Wednesday
I don’t even know how to describe life right now. Some moments are calm and I’m so content my eyes well up with happy tears looking at my big beautiful family. Some are so chaotic that I can’t catch my breath and I’m constantly running and I don’t know if my kids are fine or if I’m failing them. And some days I feel like everything I’m doing is wrong and I’m definitely failing them. So I guess if I give you an answer one day and you don’t like the answer, just ask again a few minutes later?
You’d think that sleeping less would mean you’d have more hours in the day to, well.. do more? And maybe it’s true, but all those things you want to do, you need to figure out a way to do them without your hands. Occasionally it works - I read an entire book the other day. But most of the time I’m struggling to accomplish one thing that needs to get done that day.
HOW did we get here. I had babies and babies and suddenly I have a child old enough to go to school (which you will this fall).
You are sweet and caring and love to do things to make other’s happy. You send love notes to people in the mail, bring your siblings their favorite toys, share treats/snacks and you love to cuddle, especially after you’re supposed to be in bed.
You feel things deeply and take things personally. I often have to make sure I take extra time to talk about feelings with you. For example yet another pair of pants you were wearing ended up getting a hole in the knee, and I could see how sad you were. You were feeling ashamed, like you’d done something wrong. I had to sit you down and let you know that it wasn’t your fault, it was the pants. They weren’t strong enough, and we’d buy new ones. I didn’t want you to play any differently or worry about them. I can definitely see the rule following personality traits of an oldest child forming in you, and while it’s something that can be helpful to a parent or teacher, I want you to learn when to break the rules too.