Bits and Pieces of a Toddler

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Every once in a while, E picks up a new phrase. Sometimes it’s obvious he got it from us, but sometimes it seems random. We assume it comes from daycare, but we never know for sure. Lately his phrase has been “walk away.” It’s equally hilarious and insulting. It usually comes when he’s doing something on his own and we’re trying to help. Like when he decides he wants to feed the baby by shoving food in his mouth, and we try to intervene, he’ll look at me and say “No, Mama. Walk away.” Somehow it’s cuter than if he just told us to go away, and it’s equally as funny when he tells the baby to do it too. We should probably try to encourage him to use different language… but we’re enjoying it for now.

Another phrase that he’s picked up is “right now.” As in “Go outside? Right now!” Or “Snack? Right now!” “Mama read book right now!” Everything is either now or never to a toddler, so it makes sense. He’s also seemed to pick up on the fact that it helps him get things a bit quicker, so it’s been added to almost every question or phrase lately.

Another phrase you might hear that will leave you confused? “Three happy birthdays.” Usually as a question or a demand. And yes, we’re still talking about that two minute video clip on Netflix that we found recently. E is obsessed with the song, and so we’ve decided to limit how many times we’ll play it a day, to the completely random and picked out of thin air number of three. But once you set a line with a toddler, if we’ve learned anything, it’s that we cannot move it. So he gets three a day. That’s it. And he knows it, and he will often ask to cash them in. And then for six minutes both him and the baby turn into absolute zombies and remind us why we’re happy they don’t watch more TV.

We did let them watch an episode of Sesame Street recently when we weren’t feeling great, but it didn’t really hold E’s attention. I think Tom and I watched it more than he did. It must have stuck a bit in his head though, because he recently grabbed a book the neighbors had given us with the Sesame Street characters in it. He didn’t want me to read it, he just pointed at each character and said “What’s that?” which is his way of asking “Who is that?” Super awkward when we’re in public, by the way. He’ll point to someone he doesn’t know, and he wants me to tell him their name or who they are, but instead he’ll just point to their face and go “What’s that?”

So after a few times through the book, I realized we did have another Sesame Street book one of his classmates had given him for Valentine’s day last year. We hadn’t read it much because there aren’t really words – it’s just a book counting 1 through 10, but what it does have is big pictures of all the Sesame Street characters. So with a bit of quick googling on my phone, we went through the book naming everyone. Over and over.

And in case you’re wondering, yes he does have a favorite. And it’s not any of the orange ones (I was sure it would be Zoe), or Oscar or Cookie Monster. Nope. It’s Bert. Except he can’t say Bert. It sound more like Boop. And yes, I do think it sound a little like he’s asking for poop when he says it. And there is Big Boop and Little Boop and Boop with pigeons and Boop with an orange basketball. The only thing that would make him happier right now is an orange sheep. Which he’s been asking for, for WEEKS now. “Orange baa baa? Orange baa baa, RIGHT NOW?” I’ve googled and checked Amazon and I can’t find any toys, books or stuffed animals that fit the description. I’m not sure why he has it in his mind that it exists and he needs it, but I’m going crazy with all the asking. I’m at the point I might dye one of his stuffed animals.

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